My Dusty Old Shelf

I have realised yet again that I am absolutely rubbish at keeping a blog. Every time I get the burst of inspiration to write something, I never have the time. And when I do have time, I have no idea what to write about. Alhamdulillah, I have reached the end of my pre-clinical phase of medical school. Huh, not even halfway through medical school and I'm already half dead haha. Exams are in less than a month and I still have so much revision ahead of me. I kindly beg for your prayers that I will do well :( My End of Phase battle plan is as follows: 1. Make a revision schedule according to my exam schedule.  Since my exam schedule has gaps in between papers, I will have time to sort of revise that subject beforehand. And surprisingly, there's like a five-day gap between by OSCEs and my Physiology paper, giving me ample time to study. So I sort of can put off studying Physiology and focus on other subjects. 2. Go through ALL lectures.  Focus on the subjects that I am ...

Alhamdulillah. Another year has passed and I have aged another year (two days ago). Haha My 21st year of living has proven to be a challenging year. More challenges to come I'm sure. I sort of promised myself that I'd update this blog more often but.. Whenever I'm in the mood to blog, I won't have any ideas what to blog about. When I do have ideas, I usually have no time to. Okay, whatever it is, I just wanted to talk about the people who made turning 22 special. My family who decided to wish me a happy birthday hours early, because they said that since I was born in Malaysia, my birthday is according to Malaysia's time zone +8! Thank you to my wonderful mother who gave birth to me. My father who raised us in such a way that we turned out the way we are now. And my baby brothers, no matter how old you are, you're still my babies forever. (Reallyyyyyy old picture from like 3 years ago because I couldn't find a recent family photo that'...

So yes, as most people have already found out, I am back in Belfast. About two months earlier than I should. I can't count the number of people who asked me why. I can't be bothered to answer. I'm repeating a paper. Yes, a paper. From way back when in Sem 1 when I was not focused enough and my egotistical self underestimated how difficult the exam would be. But fret not, I learnt from my mistakes and I did quite well in Sem 2 alhamdulillah :) So all I ask now is for your prayers and forgiveness. It's quite tough here in Queen's. If I fail this time around, I have to "withdraw from the course" or in other words, they're kicking me out. So I am desperate for all the help and prayers I can get. May Allah bless you.

It's Tuesday, so it's clinical attachment day! Yay....... Hey, don't get me wrong, I do enjoy my time at my GP Surgery but yeah, it's the second day of class after a long break. No one's really in the mood quite yet, or at least I'm not. Haha So, lately I've been getting a lot of questions from my juniors, my friends' juniors, and acquaintances about Medicine. What it's like. How do you get in. How smart do you have to be. etc. How do it even answer all those questions? Firstly let me tell you this, whatever I've said to you or what I will say is based purely on my own experiences and opinions . So please don't make your decisions solely on what I said. Disclaimer. Hahaha Medicine is not an easy course, which I'm sure everybody knows. To get in, it takes a lot of work and once you're in, it takes even more work. You should know that no two medical schools are alike so pleaseeeee don't ask me things like "which ...

Half a year has passed since I started in Queen's and I have to admit that it's hard .  No I know studying for a degree isn't a walk in the park or what but it's just so much harder than I anticipated it to be. Long hours in class, journeys to the hospital etc. And when I have free time, I feel guilty if I don't study. Whaaaaaaaat is that?  I've been having second thoughts about my future and I'm still feeling undecided.  Just hoping to clear things out really really soon or I might burst.  So now, I'm currently on my Spring break for three weeks. And after some deliberating, I chose to spend my spring break in Malaysia. Kumpul semangat orang kata. InsyaAllah.

Tomorrow is the second Monday of the second semester. Life passes us by just like that , doesn't it? Second semester proves to be far more challenging than the first. And I practically crawled through my first semester. Gah. So how will I get through my second semester? Any way of travelling that is more loser-y than crawling. Results come out in two days and I expect the worse. Not being a pessimist or anything. I know my input, I predict my output. My input was minimal so I guess my output will be dismal. But still, faith in Allah right? Haha what is this Nabilah, tawakal tanpa usaha -___- Well anyway, on a brighter note, I'm 21! Like two weeks ago. Hahaha 21st birthday on the 21st of January. Alhamdulillah, I've been given a chance to go through another year, in hopes that I will be closer to Allah. On an even bright er note, I celebrated my birthday three times this year. Hahaha First, with the girls of my house who baked me an awesome cheesecake e...

Lately, I've been feeling like I am so far away from Allah... And it makes me feel guilty that I've only come to realise this when I'm struggling for my exams. Astaghfirullah. Nak jadi apa ni Nabilah...  Yet Allah gives me another chance. Again, and again, and again. How amazing is He... This made me realise that I have no rights whatsoever over anything. Forgive, forget, give another chance. If Allah, Tuhan kita yang Maha Besar tu boleh asyik bagi kita peluang no matter how many times we screw up like hell, kita ni siapa nak marah orang kalau dia buat silap? "You take one step towards Allah, He will take ten steps towards you. If you walk towards Allah, He will run towards you."  -Hadith Qudsi- How small, insignificant and dismal we are. How amazing is He. Yet we act like we don't need Him. Learn Nabilah, LEARN.